1) When my 14-pound cat crawls onto my chest mid-slumber, I won’t wake up thinking I’m having a heart attack.
It's not a heart attack - just a tubby tabby.
2) I will no longer tag or untag photos based on the size of my double chin.
3) I will stop crash-dieting pre-vacation only to be the same weight I was when I come back. (C’mon – you know you’ve done it too! Vacation food can be irresistible!)
- Because one Pina Colada just wasn’t enough.
4) I’ll no longer judge my day based on how good the food was. (Ok, I admit it, I probably still will.)
5) “My 20s” will no longer refer to a jeans size – just a decade in time.
6) I will no longer drink strong coffee before I get on the scale in hopes of losing a couple of extra ounces.
7) My only fear of getting on a roller coaster will come from adrenaline… not if the harness will fit over my belly!
8) The only “plus” in my life will be a social network, positive attribute or mathematical action.
9) I’ll stop wearing my pants like Urkel to smoothe out rolls of fat.
10) I’ll stop holding my breath after going up a flight of stairs trying to pretend like I’m in shape. “Why no, I’m not out of breath… Just a heavy breather.”
What’s the number one reason you want to get healthy? It doesn’t have to be losing weight!
This Saturday morning started out like any other – I peeled myself out of bed at 9:00, threw on some exercise clothes, and groggily drove to the gym for my weigh in and 9:30 boxing class. I was eager about this weigh-in, because I knew it would be a loss. I had worked out HARD several times this week, eaten well, and drank tons of water. My jeans were loose. Somebody at work said I looked thinner. I bought new jeans in a smaller size. My tummy area looked flatter and less paunchy. Oh yes, I had DEFINITELY lost weight. Until… I got on the scale and saw the number had moved down a tiny .2 of a pound. My initial reaction was, “What the Fu*k?!” And then I was pissed, and the poor punching bag got pummeled even harder in my class, and my poor friend Merrie had to listen to me rant about why my body seems incapable of losing weight.
How could I work out for an hour and half with Richard and NOT lose weight?!
Never one to give up, I decided I was going to weigh myself again immediately after class – in exactly the same outfit, but now I was drenched with sweat and a little less aggro. Surprisingly, this time, the scale showed a loss of 1.2 pounds. I got on three times to confirm it wasn’t just wishful thinking. Now – Am I cheating because my first weigh in was only down .2? Is this weigh in still legit? For shits and giggles, I weighed myself sans clothes, and I had lost like 2.5 pounds. Believe me, I wanted to put down that number, but I have to stay consistent and weigh in in the same outfit every week. Can the body really swell and deflate that much within an hour? Did my boxing class sweat out a pound of salt and bloat that I’d been holding earlier? And no, cuz I know you’re wondering, I didn’t remove a rib or go #2 or anything like that, thank you very much.
I’ll be weighing in a day earlier this week, and I’m hoping I can finally hit my five pound mini goal. Even though I’m claiming a loss this week, I need to get more serious about tracking. The exercise is there, but my food habits are still at about 70% when they need to be at 90%. *sigh* If you took a long look at how hard you’re trying with a new goal, what would be your percentage of success?
Check back on Wednesday for my experience with Richard Simmons - it was an awesome adventure!