Note to self: When you have the plague.

I first got the plague on our second week in Thailand. It started with a sore throat, and by the time the clock struck 12 on New Year’s Eve, I knew I was in for it. The head-packed-with-cotton feeling soon proceeded, and then the simultaneous fever and chills blessed me with their presence. Upon return to LA, I was still carrying this virus, but figured it would quickly shake off. NOPE. We’re almost two full weeks since we got back, and I’m still dealing with this cold. It’s not nearly as bad as it was, but when combined with my allergies, I’m a congested, sniffly mess.

To make matters worse, my husband has the flu, so our house in general has become the sick bay – with tissue boxes, dayquil dosing cups and abandoned cups of orange juice decorating our space. Here are some crucial points for myself to remember next time I have the plague and am trying to lose weight:

1) Peanut Butter Cups are not a suitable lunch because you didn’t go grocery shopping. Delicious, sure, but do you really want to “spend” 360 calories on two pieces of candy? Nope, but you did, and that made your exercise routine all the more enjoyable. Cough. Not.

2) You might feel better if you take a shower. Yesterday’s gnome pajamas aren’t a hot look for anybody, even if you’re infirm.

3) Nyquil should be taken at night. Not accidentally in the day like you did yesterdzZZzZZzzzzz.

4) Top Ramen is still a cheap and quick fix. Just don’t make it extra crunchy by cracking the egg pitifully on the edge of the pot. Egg shells do not a gourmet meal make.

5) Blogging in advance is a good idea, so your readers don’t get random lists of what not to do next time you have the plague.

It’s going around, kids. Take your vitamin C and wash your hands – or don’t, and be like the girl in the Devil wears Prada – “I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight!”.