April’s review of an amazing Mother-Approved bra!

Happy Friday!!!!

I’m excited that my third week of school is over and I have three whole days to relax… sit around… do whatever I feel like doing…

I wish!

Instead of lounging on the couch just chillin’ in my snuggie pretending I’m Bruno Mars in The Lazy Song I’ll be babysitting for three nights straight for two kids (7 year old boy and 5 year old girl) that I regularly watch.  I’ll appreciate those moments that I get to sit down while driving the kids to and from the weekend’s activities. I’ll also be appreciating the lack of a HARD METAL WIRE stabbing me in  the bosom as I am on the ground picking up the trail of stuff that kids tend to always leave all over the house.

The awesome folks over at fullbeauty were incredibly generous and sent both my sister and myself a wireless and comfortable bra of our choice to try out.  As you might remember from Alyssa’s earlier post, we both randomly chose the same bra, even the same color!  And it’s not like this company only has the choice of white, beige, and black likeMOST of the bra choices in life tend to be.  The camisole style of wireless bra I chose came in TWELVE colors, but Alyssa and I were thinking practicality I suppose when we chose the color white.

FullBeauty Lace Cami SoftCup Bra in Lavender Tulip

FullBeauty Lace Cami SoftCup Bra in Lavender Tulip instead of white for the sake of showing another awesome color choice

I have had this bra for a few weeks now and it’s definitely received constant use.  After washing it, the bra has gotten really comfortable, it’s almost like I’m wearing a sports bra because of the soft fabric it’s made out of.

As Alyssa discussed, one of the benefits of a bra like this is that it helps you manage a modest appearance in shirts that may otherwise make men ogle your lovely chest.  Hello, nurse!

Thank you to Daniel's Blog for this Animaniac love!

Thank you to Daniel’s Blog for this Animaniac love!

Before I got this lovely gift of coverage in the mail, I was wearing one of my common winter shirts about to go out to lunch with a guy I have been randomly seeing for a little while now.  As we walked out of the house we ran into my Mother, whom this new guy had never had the pleasure of meeting before as we aren’t at that level of “meeting the parents” yet.  My Mom tends to be pretty friendly, some would say bold (mostly her children), when it comes to meeting attractive men and after she gave him a big hug and praised him on his rugged good looks, she turned to me.  Immediately she cracked a joke about my “boobs hanging out” in front of him and pulled up my top for me, trying to cover up the nice cleavage I was rocking.

Rocking my shirt appropriately at the Hooters in Zurich, Switzerland

Rocking my shirt appropriately at the Hooters in Zurich, Switzerland

That story alone is a great example of why wearing this camisole bra from fullbeauty could have saved me loads of embarrassment in that particular situation.

Check out the proof in the pictures and get on over to fullbeauty before March 31st, 2013 for 20% Off Highest Priced Item + Free Shipping on $50+. (Expires 03/31/13).  Use coupon code: FBA9009. You should also check out their semi-annual bra sale, where some bras are up to 75% off.

My Mother-Approved improvement to my shirt with the addition of the fullbeauty camisole bra

My Mother-Approved improvement to my shirt with the addition of the fullbeauty camisole bra

I hope you all enjoy your weekend and I look forward to updating you all next week on the awesome progress the month of January brought me!

Lots of love,

AprilSignatur

 

Bras.

Men, or anybody who’s uncomfortable with breast talk, you may want to just head over to Cracked.com or The Oatmeal, cuz’ this post isn’t for you. (I’m sure because I said that means you’ll keep reading. I warned you.) This post was inspired by my recent need for smaller bras (Yay weight loss! Boo bras!).

Photo borrowed from Brokelyn.com.

I’m firing my bra. Bra, you are the bane of my existence. You are an awkward, uncomfortable, expensive thing that has the fulltime job of holding up my lovely lady lumps. That wouldn’t be such a bad job if you were able to do it with competence, ease and comfort, but you need to be fired. I am terminating your services and finding someone else.  You need to be fired for being cone shaped when my boobs are round. For having a pokey, cold metal skewer that digs into the underside of my boobs like an awkward half-way hug. You need to be fired for having thick, lame straps that cut into my shoulders, and for having stupid marketing drivel on your tags like “age defying lift” and “back smoothing minimizer”.

I don’t want age defying lift. I’m 26 years old. I want a bra that’s pretty, comfortable, and not too expensive.  I want a bra that neither flattens nor pumps up my breasts – I want a bra that supports my breasts, holds them softly, whispers to them that they’re going to be all right. You, bra, are fired, because I don’t want to hang out with you after work. As soon as I get home, I fling you off into the dark corner of my bedroom, grateful to be rid of you until the next day. We are not friends. I wish we could be.

I want a bra that shows off the good things and hides the bad. I don’t want a bra with “concealing petals” or “smooth revolution”. I want a bra that does these very basic things: supports my tatas, hides unfortunate headlights and doesn’t show through sheer shirts. I want lovely, frilly bras that hold my breasts up like they’re being worshipped, that makes them feel beautiful and loved and necessary. Occasionally I want a bra that elevates me to bombshell status, that makes my boobs look large and proud and profound. But usually, I want a bra that makes me look like the logical, professional person I am – a bra that subtly hides these rockin’ orbs from the view of the ogling Neanderthals of the universe. (Any men who are still reading: Sorry! You’re not all Neanderthals, and I know it’s just your evolutionary nature. Boobs = food for your babies.)

I want a bra that comes with pretty sounding sizes, like “Pleasantly ripe cantaloupes” or “perfectly petite peaches”. I don’t want to be a 40C, or a 38B, or a 46DD. My boobs are not an equation. They’re not letters or numbers. I want my bra size to match the worth of these beautiful, feminine shapes that grace my figure, and I think all gals might like the same, be they magnificently busty or splendidly small. I want a bra that makes me feel proud of my shape, that comes in beautiful soft fabrics and silks with pretty matching panties. A bra that can be worn all day at work, but still be pretty and soft and sensual at the end of a long day.

Why not just not wear a bra, you say? Because when you have large, round breasts, they need support. They need a nice frame to create a pretty picture, to make clothes drape nicely instead of cling, to be held up high, to keep the googly eyes away.

I settled today, Bras. I settled on four of you from a large department store, each from well-known brands that were MOSTLY comfortable and pretty and decent. But they still weren’t perfect. They’re not my soulmate. We won’t hang out late at night. We’re still not friends, and I wish we could be. If I could find the right one, we’d be the perfect pair. Can you imagine? How wonderful it would be to have the perfect bra for my perfect pair.

I’ll find you one day, Bra. I will. Even if I have to make you myself.