I love me some outlandish claims, but really? “Eat Brownies, Get Muscles!” ? That’s a whole new ballpark. I think I’d rather “Eat French Fries, Get Skinny!”
While their trademarked tagline is ridiculous, you have to admit it’s intriguing, because most protein bars I’ve tasted taste like sawdust with sugarfree hot cocoa powder dusted on top.
PS Just looked up their website and they’re in the same town I live in. Irony!
Hello dear readers: now that there’s more than a few of you, I realize I need to make this into an actual weight loss blog and LOSE some weight! Sigh – I was hoping I could keep up the facade forever 
(I jest.) I’m hoping to get my new “Progress” link going in the next few days – so help me make a decision on which way to lose my flabby fluffy flubber! PLEASE leave a comment and let me know your thoughts. I crumble easily under peer pressure… which is why my doughnut-pushing co-workers are evil. For those of you who are new to the blog, I’ve got the exercise thing goin’ on, so any plan I follow will include lots of heart pumping cardio and strength-training 
So there you have it. Tell me what you think – what’s worked for you, why it’s worked, your opinions, etc. I realize this is a personal choice, but I like to weigh out the factors on all sides before making a decision. I’m a highly analytical person and like to hear suggestions, because sometimes you get your head so far up your own butt that obvious facts get buried in vanity, stubbornness or sheer laziness. I’m also kind of ridiculously wishy-washy. Matt picked out his wedding band in 20 minutes. It took me over a month.
My brain is kind of telling me to go back to Weight Watchers, but my heart wants to believe I have that little bird of hope and inspiration in my soul that will burst into song and cling on to the deeply-hidden willpower within me. (Little bird of hope just vomited at that trite, over the top description)
So – it’s a swing vote. Influence me. Peer pressure me. Convince me. It’s time to practice your persuasive speaking skills (btw, I am VERY persuasive. Won an award for it in a college political science debate class!). Those of you lurking behind your computer screens, SAY SOMETHING! I know you’re there, I can see you in the daily visitor numbers. Say something! GO!
I wasn’t always overweight – I arrived into this world at an average 7 pounds, 4 ounces or something like that. Through out my childhood I sported plump, apple cheeks, but didn’t tilt the scales until about the age of 10, around when my family moved to California. I remember wearing the girl’s size XL, and an unpleasant discussion at the doctor’s office about being overweight. “She needs to exercise,” the doctor had said, noting my ever-climbing weight. My mom replied, no doubt in protection, “She doesn’t love sports, but she does love to read.” I’ll never forget the doctor’s reply – “Reading is great exercise for the brain – but not the body!”
Age four - no chub yet!
As puberty crept up on me, my weight blossomed even more, morphing into fleshy hips and a soft, pudgy tummy. I was outgrowing the junior’s size 12s, having to squeeze my curvy waist into cheap L.E.I. jeans in women’s size 13s from Mervyns. My first devastating insult about my weight came from a boy I had a huge crush on, Patrick. We were friends and classmates and walked home from school together, crunching leaves and sucking the sap out of honeysuckles. He called me “Hey Arnold” after the cartoon, because we both had blonde hair. He was really tall and gangly, with small, narrow eyes and a deep, nerdy voice. In gym class one day we had to run a mile. As a fumbling klutz, running was something I despised, a special torture for a chubby girl with a propensity for words. I can even remember my outfit that day -a purple Guess shirt and white cotton shorts. As we lapped the dirt track together, he taunted me that he would win. Adrenaline and ambition kicked in, and by some miracle, I propelled myself past him through the finish line, the victorious winner by a few seconds. As I applauded my own girls-against -boy victory, he hit me where he knew it would hurt – my emotions.
“Well – at least I’m not FAT!” he spat out, the friendly look in his eye replaced with macho venom.
Had I been the spunky girl I would have liked to imagine myself as, I would have replied, “Well – at least I’m not an ASSHOLE!” but instead, I slunk off like a guilty dog, reminded that once again, it didn’t matter what girls accomplished, but rather, what they looked like. I never wore those white shorts to school again. (He’s dead now, how’s that for Karma? I kid, I kid. Sadly, he is deceased of a drug overdose, which is a shame because despite this little sting, he was a nice, intelligent kid)
It’s so easy to remember the insults and the bad things that happen to you, even when you hear a lot of praise otherwise. I’d like to say comments like these didn’t affect me, but I guess they did if I’m blogging about them 14 years later – but hey, it fueled a blog post, so I guess that’s something.
Do you remember insults about your looks from days past? One of the worst I’ve ever heard is a guy who called my sister “Princess Fat Arms”. WTF! People can be so cruel.
Hello bloggies! Today was my last Weight Watchers meeting. While I know the program definitely works, I’ve faced the sad realization that for it to work, you have to be at least 90% committed to the program. As somebody who hasn’t tracked in over a month…. I’ve admitted to myself that there is no reason to continue to pay for a program I’m not following. It’s a bit of a tricky subject because we have Weight Watchers at work, which is a bit more expensive and requires at least 15 people to sign up for a new session to start.
I feel a little guilty because without my membership, they’re under the minimum people to join. Luckily I’m not the only dropout, but I just can’t part ways with $200 if I’m not REALLY gonna do it, you know? There’s a few other reasons I’m not joining too – the meetings were not inspiring to me anymore, and the meeting is scheduled at 12 pm (lunch). Since I work in the wild wild web, lunch happens when it happens… not always at noon.
I’m getting back into a steady gym habit and that seems to be helping, and I may go back to my old friend the Atkins diet for a few weeks to shed some excess flubber before my friend’s wedding. (I’m a bridesmaid!) I know the Atkins diet is crazy controversial…. but it really works for me, despite the first few days of intense, heroin withdrawal-type cravings for bread. Before my wedding, I took off a good 10-12 pounds in 3 weeks, where as Weight Watchers had taken me two months to shed that. (Again – I know which one is healthier, but let’s not get into the debates).
So – it’s with a little twinge of guilt and regret (that I lacked the commitment to give the program my all), but mostly, a happy wallet, that I step out of the Weight Watchers world and into the losing-it-on-my-own world – a less expensive, but way more personalized approach to the body I want to have. I lost 27 pounds in college just by going to the gym, cutting my carbs, and meeting with an on-campus nutritonist – so I’m feeling good about wingin’ it on my own. I’ve always been kind of a loner, anyways
Today’s Wacky Wednesday is brought to you by my sister April. She saw this advertisement recently while out on the town:
Yeah – exactly! I wish my “before” looked liked that. So, the after is a little more hour glassy, a little sexier – but still no ripped abs, and certainly not worth the torture that whatever new systems of levers and pullees to make you ripped would invoke! Ah- Advertising. The president of advertising at work (he’s my boss, and a pretty cool one at that) has this poster in his office:
Now, I’ve also been very busy at work lately, and I think I found the perfect solution to my busy lifestyle. Instead of going home for lunch to have a proper meal at a TABLE, with a fork and knife, I’m going to buy myself one of these.
Because, why waste valuable time holding a sandwich, when I could be knitting, playing the accordion or designing finger puppets, instead? Since I can’t put down my iPhone for my than 5 seconds, why not keep my ham-sammy a bite’s length away? Can you image using this thing with a Tuna Fish sandwich? Ew…. Smeary, wet fish everywhere. NOM NOM. Have you seen any weird, wacky or just plain dumb stuff around you lately?
